I worry my husband’s friends hate me for what I did

I worry my husband's friends hate me for what I did



Dear Amy: Recently there was an infidelity issue (on my part) between my husband and me.

We are working on our marriage, and things appear to be getting much better.

When it first happened, he turned to his friends pretty upset and had the majority of them block me, etc.

His best friend doesn’t speak to me much anymore, but I did reach out letting him know that I do love him and his girlfriend and don’t want to lose them and hope they don’t hate me.

He responded, stating that he isn’t making any judgment calls until he gives it time to see how my husband is feeling.

When it comes time for me to see them (they all live out of state), do you have any advice to not feel uncomfortable, awkward or scared?

I’m afraid they will hate me and will just be glaring at me with hatred the whole time.

Nervous

Dear Nervous: Your husband’s best friend responded to you honestly and responsibly. You also handled that encounter well.

Aside from that, it’s important for both you and your husband to convey that you are repairing your relationship, but that otherwise the inner workings of your marriage will remain private.

Dear Amy: We’ve been living next door to a very good neighbor for almost 30 years. “Charles” is helpful and friendly, and we genuinely like him.

His political views are 180 degrees different than ours. Until now, it hasn’t been an issue, as we have plenty of other things to discuss (gardening, family, etc.), and we have kept our views to ourselves.

The problem is that he has hung a large flag (replacing the worn-out original with a new and even bolder model) a few feet from our backyard fence. This flag contains a message representing ideals which are abhorrent to us.

See also  Bay Area TV Sports Listings: What to watch Monday-Tuesday

No profanity — just divisive and hurtful implications. I don’t think it’s an intentional attack on us or anything like that.

We cannot avoid seeing and hearing it flapping in the wind any time we’re in our yard. It extends to about 10 feet from the ground, so it can’t be blocked from view. (No other neighbors can see it.)

Visitors to our home have commented: “What do you think about that flag?” “I could get rid of that for you — ha, ha,” etc.

My husband and I don’t want to lose Charles’ friendship or ruin what has been a good relationship for years. But this is very upsetting to me, a constant reminder of the ugly divisions in our country.

I find myself avoiding my own yard (and feeling bad toward my neighbor).

What’s your advice?

Torn

Dear Torn: You don’t provide any details about this flag, nor do you say what your personal politics are, and so I am determined to envision this issue from a wide spectrum.

(I’m proceeding on an assumption that this flag doesn’t contain words or a symbol that might incite violence, but that it represents ideas or values in direct opposition to your own.)

You also don’t seem to have ever asked your neighbor if he could move the flag to another location in his yard, so it wasn’t flapping so distractingly close to your own.

We live in a country where everyone is free to let their freak flag fly, and where people like you and your neighbor can live cordially and peacefully side-by-side — each free to express themselves, or to stay quiet, if that is what you prefer to do.

Your options are to fly a flag or banner of your own, to express your own views directly or indirectly through a multitude of media, or to exercise your own freedom to keep your own thoughts to yourself.

See also  Chad Pinder’s 12th-inning grand slam lifts A’s over Rangers 14-7

I can’t tell you how to feel, but you might feel differently if you were able to reframe this. “Tolerance” is a challenge to tolerate others’ freedom of expression, even if you find their actual views abhorrent.

And so when friends ask you what you think of your neighbor’s flag, you can say, “Well, every day when I see it, I’m forced to appreciate the First Amendment. So, God bless America!”

Dear Amy: “Had Enough” wrote to you about her daughter, whose high school friends rejected her, leading to her dropping out of school.

This weakness is what is wrong with this country today.

You should have called her out; instead you coddled her.

Disappointed

Dear Disappointed: I don’t think “calling out” a vulnerable person is necessarily helpful.

You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.



Source link

Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - How Much is 500 V Bucks - Jtnb0p
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - V Buck Codes Redeem - R06gni
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Free V Bucks Codes Ps4 2021 - 50w75s
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Redeem Codes December 2021 - Tu062j
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fnbucks
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Easy Bucks
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - How to Earn Vbucks on Fortnite - Nvpk9f
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Free V Bucks No Human Verification 100 Real - W6fsyn
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Work It Out Emote - Hrwf1l
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnitebux
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Redeemable Codes - X33efm
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Codes 2021 for Skins - B53gac
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Codes 2021 for Items - 3ndxk4
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - How to Get Free V Bucks 2022 - 6ub7fw
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Codes for Free Stuff - Jwnkaa
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Vbuck Shop - 5z52fd
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Vbucks Fortnite - Rwapgk
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Digital Codes - Zf50ue
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - is Fortnite Giving Free V Bucks 2022 - 1hyvc2
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Item Shop December 22 2021 - 4sqctn
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Redeem V Bucks - Dv3ze3
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortzar
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - V Bucks Codes 2022 - 3cw8io
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - What Are V-bucks - Zqc1tu
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Ch3 S2 - 2etwby
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Codes May 2022 - P1qmsy
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Free Redeem Codes for Fortnite - 7kueik
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Free V-bucks Codes - L7b1ix
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - V Bucks Card Online - Te3w72
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fort Gag
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnight/vbox Card - Zhukm9
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Vfreebucks
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite V Bucks Generator 2021 - Fcvzbv
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Hack V Bucks - Nhuy42
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Unused Vbuck Codes - X0v5ps
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fnadder
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - V Bucks Generator No Verification - K6z7py
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Redeem Vbuck Code - P5q5ov
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - How Many V Bucks Can You Get From Save the World - Rsv2ho
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Bucks Fortnite V-bucks Gift Card Stores - Jjbjns
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Alaabionline Com Get Free Robux - Xsn1eh
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - How to Redeem V Bucks on Ps4 - Y963w0
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite V Bucks Prices 2021 - N0udb8
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Limited Edition Founders Pack - Rwf9mu
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Update 4
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - How to Redeem V Bucks on Ps4 - Y963w0
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnite Chapter 3 Battle Pass Rewards - W9p04j
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Unredeemed V Bucks Code - Ai4fy4
Free Fortnite V-bucks Generator - Fortnight Vbox Generator - M23s8k
By californianews_gkdgq8

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Related Posts